Dear Santa...

Dear Santa,

I've been good. Really I have. OK, so maybe not "good," but you know I've really tried.

Now, no matter what my Mom tells you, I have NOT been messing with the Christmas presents under our Christmas tree.

She claims I've been barking at the presents, rolling on the presents, walking on 'em, and even wiping my eye boogies on them.  How dare she blame me for all of that, especially when she knows you're watching!

Um. Nevermind, Santa. I've really tried to be good, though, and I haven't unwrapped any of those presents (yet). Does that still count as "good"?  I'd really like some Greenies for Christmas. And bully sticks. And toys...

Thanks!
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Not My Fault

This year Mom put her M&M men beside the Christmas tree. (Ignore the bicycle in this picture...)
 

Somehow, the Red guy fell over into the Christmas tree and knocked some ornaments off.

I have NO idea who might have done this.

Seriously. No idea.

OK, so maybe I might have a little bit of an idea of how that happened...

Don't tell Santa.
 

Seeing Santa

I got to see the Big Man the other day.

I told him I wanted toys, of course, and Greenies and toys and bully sticks and toys and cookies.  Oh, and toys.
 
Santa asked me if I'd been good. I changed the subject...
 

Mischief Abounds

I suppose I should really cool it with the ornery stuff since it's getting so close to Christmas.  For some reason, however, I just can't seem to stop myself!

This past weekend, for example, Mom and I were visiting our cool neighbor and I sniffed out a bag of rawhides. Our neighbor got them for a Christmas present for another doggy.  I didn't care.  I could smell what was in that bag and I wanted it. So, I barked.

And I barked.

And barked.

I wouldn't give up on getting those rawhides.  Even when they distracted me and hid the bag.

After about a bazillion minutes of my constant barking, Mom finally got tired of it.  Instead of giving me the rawhides, however, she said we had to go home early from our visit because "someone" wouldn't behave.  Oops.

Last night, then, some more of my mischief came to light.  I'd been working on this one for a long, long time. You see, Mom had a bag of old magazines, papers, and letters that was on the floor on the side of her bed.  Over time, I pulled the bag underneath the bed and proceeded to shred both the bag and its contents.

In the middle of the night, of course, when Mom was sleeping.

She knew I was up to something under there, but she wasn't quite sure what.  I blew my cover, however, when I started dragging stuff out the opposite side of the bed...

"Where on earth did all of these shredded papers come from, Mom?!"

You'll note that there's a mix of dog toys and one of Mom's socks in that mess, too.

I tried to look all innocent.

I guess there's no hiding the mess, though.

Maybe Santa won't care???

Naughty or Nice

So you know Mom and I have that ongoing argument about me going poo and pee in the spare bedroom.  Well, last Saturday Mom thought she'd straighten out my naughtiness by taking me to see the Big Man.  That's right...we went to Petsmart and saw Santa.

I hope I convinced him that I'm really not a naughty pup.  I'm nice, through and through...

I sure hope I didn't blow it, though, when I peed on the sidewalk right in the doorway to Petsmart.

Mom told me to "wait" 'cause we had to let some cars go by.  I may have taken advantage of the opportunity to leave a little "gift" for another pup to sniff.  Probably shouldn't have done that right after sitting on Santa's lap.

Mom still gave me a new Santa toy and some yummy cookies we got in the store.

But I hope I didn't blow it with the Big Man.

Maybe I shouldn't have piddled there...

Oh, dear.

Am I too naughty for Christmas presents now?!?!

My New Santa

I got a new Santa toy tonight. He says, "Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas" when you squeeze his belly. I suppose that's what the real Santa says, too. Although I wouldn't suggest squeezing the real Santa's belly. Don't know if he'd appreciate it.

Anyway, here's me napping with my new toy.

Now, I'd like to point out two things, just in case Santa is reading this...

1. I have not plucked any naked spots on my new Santa.

2. Sleeping with a toy in my mouth is just a sign that I really love that toy. It does not mean that I want to eat Santa.

Bah Humbug!

Not too long ago, Mom decided to torture me. First, she made me try on a party dress she bought last year. It was too small last year, but since she starved me this fall, she thought maybe it would fit again.

It did not.

And she forgot to take any pictures of the dress this time, so she had to just reenact the torture tonight. You'll note in the following pictures that I refused to sit up, so she had to wiggle me into the dress while I laid there like a wet noodle. HA!

It looked like it fit...but it was too small to velcro along my belly.

So after the dress torture, Mom broke out a Santa suit. She got it last year, too, but it was on sale after Christmas. She never tried it on me last year.

The Santa suit was too, too big.

Mom tried to put the hood up, but then my head got stuck. My front leg got stuck, too, when I was trying to rescue my head. Did Mom help me? Noooo. She took a picture.

Eventually, I made my way over to my doggie bed and I tried to eat the stupid suit. Mom finally took it off me.

Then, the crazy woman continued the torture. She put an ELF HAT on me. It was super small. About suffocated me with the stupid chin strap.

Naturally, I let Mom know exactly what I thought of that stupid hat...

So WHY was Mom torturing me with all that stuff? Turns out that she had big plans for me. That's right...we went to see the Big Man. Luckily, none of those stupid clothes fit, so I got to go see Santa without looking like an idiot.

I told him that I want more toys for Christmas. (As if you couldn't have guessed that...)

I got a new toy when we went to see Santa, too. They were squeaking a ball toy to get me to look at the camera, so Mom figured it was only fair to give me one of those balls they'd been taunting me with. (Um..YEAH!)

I played with it and played with it on the way home.

And then I took a nap with my new ball toy.

I hope Santa appreciates the torture I went through. Surely that should mean more squeaky toys for me for Christmas, don't you think?

Holiday Poetry

The other day I found out about a Holiday Poetry Contest on a blog written by a doggy who's training to be a guide dog. Pretty cool, huh? His name is Rudy.

Anyway, to enter the contest you just write a poem. And the prize for the contest is...TOYS. How could I pass up this opportunity? My sis Lexi-Lou used to write poems on her blog, so I figured it was about time that Mom helped me out with one, too. And I mean, seriously, I could use some more toys.

So, I submitted my poem over on Rudy's blog, but I figured I'd post it here, too. I sorta like how it turned out. Just remember that this poem is entirely fiction. Honest. It's fiction.

An Important Reminder

Santa Paws is coming

Just as long as we’re all good

So we have to mind our parents

And behave as we should.

If we all can make it

The payoff is sublime

But we all must behave

…Most of the time!

Cookies, treats, and dog beds

Some fun squeaky toys

Oh, you know I love those

And their squeaky noise!

So no misbehaving, please

Or Santa won’t appear.

We just can’t have a repeat

Of what happened last year!

Don’t chase the neighbor

No puking on the bed

We shouldn’t chew on slippers.

Only eat what we’re fed.

Keep those all in mind, of course,

But most importantly,

This year no one potty

On our Christmas tree!

Ta dah! There's my poem. If you want to enter Rudy's contest yourself, just head on over to his blog.

And remember...that poem was fiction. Well, except for the part about me liking toys.

Rawhide

I was getting a drink of water tonight when I realized that Mom was standing right behind me.

And then I saw what she had in her hand for me...a RAWHIDE! I got so excited. It was one of the rawhides that Santa brought me when we were at Grandma's house!

"Give me the rawhide, Mom!!!"

Yeeeeeees!

I took it over to my blankies and bed in the living room. That's a comfy spot. (And no, I don't think I have enough toys nearby...)

Then I started chewing away on it. Yummy in my tummy!

I had to take a nap after a while. All of that chewing sort of wore me out. Used my bee hive as a pillow.

Ahhh... It was a good night. I love those rawhides! Thank you, Santa!