Icky, Sicky Messes

Someone made a big mess in our house today while Mom was at work. It couldn't have been ME, right? I'm completely innocent...

OK, so maybe it was me...

I got sick today while Mom was gone. And then I got sick again. And again. I actually managed to pukey in 9 different places inside our house. (That's got to be a new record, right?)

When Mom got home and found the mess, she broke out the SpotBot. I supervised.

"You toys doing OK? Don't worry about that SpotBot. It's just cleaning up the pukey." (I actually "got" the hallway in three spots -- there are two cleaned-up ones behind me.)

I'll admit that I was a little worried about Mom being upset with me 'cause of the mess. I hid under the bed for a bit. Took my snake under there with me, too.

But I shouldn't have worried. Mom never got upset with me. She just cleaned up the messes (for an hour) and petted me lots and lots. I think she was worried about me being sick. I did my best to look pathetic. I even hid under the table...looking super pathetic...

Mom cleaned and cleaned and finally got the carpets all nice again. Then Mom decided that there was too much pukey on me, too, and she said that I smelled. I didn't care...wasn't bothering ME. That didn't stop her, though. She took me to the bathtub. I hate that place. Here's a picture of me right before I launched myself out of the tub and ran to hide under the bed.

Sadly, Mom managed to pull me out from under the bed, and she took me back to the tub. She gave me a "sponge bath" on my chin, face, and ears 'cause of the pukey smell. I refused to look at her.

I gave her lots of dirty looks after the sponge bath, too.

Then I went right back to acting pathetic.

The only good thing that came out of the events of the evening was the fact that Mom put me back on the yummy bland diet. YES! Bring on the boiled hamburger and rice!!! So much tastier than dry kibble.

Now it's time to nap again...

Snake Attack!!!

Today started out like a normal Saturday for us, but then things took a terrible, horrible turn for the worst when I noticed Mom putting my duckies into the bathtub. That's never a good sign. Sure enough, THIS happened...

In addition to the typical bath horror, Mom decided to torture me with a stupid wash cloth. She used it to get the allergy goops off of my eyes, but then she had to go and do THIS...

That was totally NOT funny. Of course I tried to escape.

But Mom kept catching me and putting me back in the tub. Darn it! I suppose it was probably about time I had a bath, though. Check out how dirty that water is from just little old me! He he he.

After my bath ordeal, I took some extra time to dry my furs on my doggie bed.

Now you're probably wondering why I called this post "Snake Attack!!!" if I was only gonna talk about my stupid bath. Well, here's why...

After my bath, Mom took me out for a short walk. We saw our mailman outside and he had a package for us. When we got back inside, Mom opened the package...and there was a vicious, hideous, rattler SNAKE inside!

I knew that it was my job to protect Mom in this situation. I am, after all, a doggie. So I jumped right in and attacked that horrible snake.

Here's some video of me taking care of the rattler snake!

Of course I had to pluck it, too...

After the snake was properly subdued, I had to rest for a while. That snake wore me out.

What a day...what a day...

Fetching Fiasco

Mom and I were playing fetch tonight with my hamburger toy.

And then we had a problem...

See that? Mom actually tossed my hamburger down the hallway and it landed right smack in my water bowl. It was totally her fault.

I told Mom that I was NOT going to get that hamburger out of the water bowl. After all, she's the one who threw it in there.

Mom finally got the hamburger out for me after she stopped laughing and taking pictures. She didn't dry the hamburger off, but that was o.k. At least I didn't have to dunk myself to get it.

We played fetch some more, and then I decided I needed to get a drink out of my newly-hamburgered water bowl. It's a good thing that the water didn't taste funny.

All of that drama wore me out. (Doesn't take much, does it? He he he.)

I hope Mom has better aim when she tosses for fetch tomorrow!

Souvenir # 2

Tonight Mom broke out my other souvenir from her vacation. She got me a squeaky, stuffingless ostrich! How cool is that?! I've never seen a squeaky ostrich before.

Mom taunted me with it before she gave it to me. How ruuuude.

I finally got it away from her, and then I headed to my brown bed and played like crazy!

Here's some video of me with my ostrich. Yes, I'm plucking its booty in the beginning...

I had a whole lot of fun with my vacation souvenir. As usual, I wore myself out and had to nap for a while.

See where that ostrich is? Yep -- right in my mouth! I'm not letting Mom take it away from me ever...

Midnight Excursions

Someone has decided to go out to poo at midnight for the last two nights in a row. Certainly it couldn't be this innocent-looking doggie...

I guess I do look a little sleepy in that picture. He he he. That's because it was 12:30 a.m.!

And THIS is what I looked like in the morning when Mom had to get up to go to work:

Mom says I'm ornery, but I just don't see it...

My Bland Diet

Apparently, Mom is not a fan of having to take me out to potty at 2:00 a.m. I discovered that for sure last night. She really wasn't thrilled about the fact that I sorta had some...um...issues, either. If you're squeamish, you'd better skip ahead a bit... 'cause I'm talking about runny poo. Wasn't the first time, either. It's happened off and on for the last few days.

So Mom announced tonight that we're nipping this in the butt. (Pun intended.) She said she was switching me to a bland diet for a few days. I had no idea what she meant, but she said that she used to do this for Lexi when Lexi had tummy trouble and it helped her get all better.

Anyway, Mom took forever to cook herself supper tonight. I had to sit at the edge of the kitchen and supervise...

But then I realized that Mom wasn't cooking supper for herself...she was making food for ME! Turns out that this "bland diet" she was talking about is actually boiled hamburger and rice.

My table was set. (I added that squeaky bug myself. Needed a cool centerpiece.)

I totally chowed down!


Turns out that this "bland diet" stuff really rocks. I licked my bowl clean in record time. YUMMY!

Mom gave me a tiny bit more hamburger and rice later this evening and I think there was a little pink crunchy thing in there, too. But surely she didn't hide allergy medicine in my bland diet...right?

And now for your viewing pleasure, here's some video of me snarfing down that food.

I make some really cool snorty sounds in this one. He he he...



So what have we learned today? First, "bland diet" totally ROCKS. Second, I'm not so "ladylike" when I eat. He he he.

Snort.

Discussions with Mom

I had to have a serious talk with my Mom tonight...



There was a piece of popcorn stuck under the couch and she totally didn't see it! So I barked at her for a while. Then I broke down and decided to try to get the piece of popcorn out myself. That's when she FINALLY realized what I was so upset over.

Good grief. Do I have to spell everything out for her?!

Since I was such a good girl in pointing out the piece of popcorn (and "disposing" of it, too), I decided I deserved a cookie. After all, I DID help Mom out. So I went to the kitchen doorway and sat there. And stared at Mom.

She knew exactly what I was after that time...