I Was Weed-Whackered!

Last night I was ambushed with a bath. Tonight Mom decided that my bangs were too long. WHEN will this torture end?!

She put me in the bathroom sink because that's where she thinks she can "contain" me.

But I kept planning my escape the whole time, so I think she finally learned that the sink ain't the spot she thinks it is.

OK. So maybe my bangs were a little long. It was getting a bit hard to see.

But between Mom's lack of experience and me fidgeting up a storm, the results were NOT good. My bangs look like they've been attacked by a weed whacker!

Just as soon as I got out of that sink, THIS is all Mom saw of me...

Here's a close-up of the damages. Some pieces are still too long, and there's a super short spot right in the middle.

It isn't pretty. But I guess at least I can sort of see now. Mom says it's a good thing that I don't have a mirror in my princess tent, 'cause maybe I'll just forget that my bangs were whacked.

Forget this experience? Never. Instead, I'm adding another layer of fun to my plans for revenge. I'm thinking of super loud squeakies now -- AND my animal sounds Babble Ball -- at 3:30 a.m. under Mom's bed...

That'll teach her.

Ambushed!

Let me ask you something. Does this look like a doggie who deserves to be harassed?

What about this? Does THIS look like a doggie who needs to be tormented and tortured?

Unfortunately, that is exactly what happened tonight, my friends. I was napping, minding my own business, and then suddenly AMBUSHED by this...

Yes, I had to take a bath.

After weeks of reprieve, I thought I had won the War of the Bathtub. Mom hadn't subjected me to a bath for a long, long time. Apparently, however, I was wrong. She just lulled me into a sense of complacency and then WHAM...bath torture.

Looking pathetic and cute has no effect on Mom when she's in bath mode. My charms are powerless.

The woman was on a serious "get Buttons clean" mission, too. I prefer to be stinky. And dirty. I am a dog, you know.

And you can see just how upset I am by looking at my tail in this picture. Is it up and curly and wagging? Noooo. I am not a happy pup.

Since all of my attempts to escape the bath seemed to have no impact on Mom, I finally just stuck my tongue out at her. Take THAT!

Of course the normal blow dryer torture ensued after the bath. You'll notice that I sat RIGHT BY the bathroom door, awaiting my escape.

When Mom finally let me out of the bathroom, I went a little crazy. Then I hid under the blanket on the couch. I didn't want to end up back in that bathroom.

When I realized that I was safe, however, I decided to dry myself off the rest of the way by rolling on the carpet.

Then I took out some of my frustrations on a penguin toy.

In my opinion, tonight's ambush bath was entirely uncalled for. Just ridiculous. I was stinky for weeks, so why the torture tonight?!

I WILL get back at Mom for this. I'm working on a plan right now. I can't divulge all of the details, but I can tell you that it involves squeaky toys under Mom's bed at 3:30 a.m....

My New Sofa

At one of the Twitter parties, I won a gift certificate to Nip and Bones from MizzBassie. Cool, huh? So, Mom and I decided that I could use some furnishings for my princess tent. We ordered a doggie bed that looks just like a little sofa.

I must admit, though, that I got a little confused when it arrived. You see, I'm used to always getting TOYS in the boxes that come to our house. Not doggie beds. So, naturally, when the huge box arrived, I assumed it was filled with toys.

And it was a BIG box, too. I went a little crazy.

As soon as Mom got the sofa out of the box, I immediately "checked in the edges for change someone might have dropped." (He he he.)

OK, so maybe I wasn't checking for change. What I was actually doing was pulling the cushion out of the couch because I thought for sure that it was a toy. It looked like some of my toys...and toys come in boxes...so it HAD to be a toy!

Yes, I attacked the new sofa.

I refused to leave the cushion in the sofa, too. I kept pulling it out and trying to squeaky it. Mom even caught me on video trying to squeaky and pluck the sofa cushion. (There was actually a squeaky UNDER the cushion that kept squeaking, too, so that just egged me on!)

I even rolled on the sofa and cushion just like I roll on my toys.

Eventually, I went and got another squeaky and played with it inside my new sofa. (Just like I play with toys in my round bed!) The sofa makes a nice echo chamber for squeakies. I had fun doing that until Mom realized that I was plucking the sofa instead of the toy. Oops.

I refused to leave the cushion in the sofa for most of that first day we had it. When it was on top of the sofa, I buried toys under the cushion, too. And then I even buried myself!

Since then, Mom has managed to convince me that the sofa cushion is actually a cushion and not a squeaky toy. So, I leave it in the sofa most of the time. But I still like to stick toys under it sometimes.

And I love to play in it, too, of course.

But most of the time now, my new sofa is used for napping.

It's a comfy couch!

Mom's in Trouble

Mom had the audacity to leave me all morning and part of the afternoon, too. And then you know what? She left again this evening! That's just rude. And it's uncalled for...especially on the weekend!

So, I showed her. When she got home and wanted to play with me tonight, I wouldn't have anything to do with her. Instead, I took my squeaky ball and went into my princess tent.

She rudely tried to take pictures of me while I was in the tent. I refused to look at her.

I waited her out. She finally gave up trying to take pictures of me and trying to get me out of the tent. I had to take a quick peek.

I think she's learning her lesson.

My Big Personality

I make Mom laugh. I make Mom laugh a lot. Why does she laugh at me so much? I don't know. I'm just being me. Mom says I'm silly and I have a whole lot of personality...whatever that means.

So, you tell me if this sort of stuff is funny dog behavior. It seems completely normal to me.

1. I think it's perfectly fine to play with my orange soccer ball while upside down on my back with my head under my dog bed.

2. What about flipping dog beds upside down and then digging in the bottom of them like there's dirt there?

3. Or maybe rolling on a toy and then digging in the big chair (and seeing if I could get into any mischief from there)? I did that until I realized that Mom was watching me...oops.

So, you be the judge. Am I funny? Do I have a "whole lot of personality?" Or am I just being a normal doggie? Or maybe "all of the above"...

Squeaky Animals

Sorry I haven't been able to post lately. Mom was busy (a.k.a., Mom's a slacker). And then we went on vacations, and then Mom was a slacker (I mean "busy") some more. Anyway, more on that later.

Today's topic is my new alligator. My cool neighbor gave it to me when Mom and I went over to visit her. So, here's me rolling on my alligator...

Oh -- another time we went to visit, our neighbor gave me a cool squeaky fishy, too!

And here's the birdie that the neighbor gave me. It makes chirping sounds instead of squeaks. Mom LOVES that 'cause she says it's nice to hear chirps for a change. I guess she gets tired of squeaks...although I don't know how that's possible...

Oh, yeah. You read this right. That's THREE toys from our cool neighbor. Know what, though? That's nothing... She actually gives me a new toy every single time I go to visit! Can you believe that?! There's another dog who lives near here, too, who loves toys a lot. His name is Freddy. So, our super cool neighbor actually gets toys for both Freddy and me!

I really love my neighbor. And I know you're all jealous now, too. He he he!

What's That Sound?!

There was a strange noise coming from our chair the other day. It was a strange, snoring sound. Did one of my squeakies come to life and then decide to nap?! Mom went closer to investigate...

And then a little closer...

And just a bit closer still...

Ta dah! The source of the snoring sound was discovered...it was ME!

Mom should have known that from the start. (And she shouldn't have woken me up!)